"A list of all good things"

So before Bella blew up a disc in her neck, we were chatting happily about the behavioral path we've been on with her since just after Christmas. I told you about how she had flipped out on me just before Christmas and our conversation with Dr. Dodman and his staff and what treatment option we chose to pursue with his team. Tonight, I'll finally get around to telling you how it's been going.

When we last spoke, Jan and I had chosen to add Gabapentin - a neurogenic pain medication with anti-convulsant properties - to Bella's treatment regime.

As a recap, Bella's still on Soloxine (for sub-clinical hypothyroidism) as well as Fluoxetine (anti-anxiety) but we've taken her off the Clonidine (our original wonder drug) and switched it for the Gabapentin. She still gets a tiny bit of Clonidine for especially noisy situations like snow-blowers, thunderstorms and snow falling from rooftops.

So how has it been going? Well, here's a list of things Jan and I have said to each other about Bella over the last couple of months:

• "She slept through New Years' Eve fireworks without so much as a blink."
• "She closes her eyes when I pet her."
• "She actually fell asleep when I was petting her!"
• "Wait, did she just come in to bed without the usual histrionics?"
• "She comes and gets in her own bed as soon as the lights are out."
• "She sniffed a fly! Come here, watch!"
• "She slept right through me stepping over her in the closet."
• "She slept through the morning squirrel crossing!"

Also of note:

• Her ears are up and happy.
• Her face is softer and eyes more relaxed.
• And she requests petting sessions.

I still don't really know what's going on: has she been suffering from nerve-pain and twitchy-tingling for oh these many years and has finally found relief? (I have reason to believe she has...) Or is she really experiencing a seizure-like episode? I'll go deeper into what we believe is going on in our next chapter.

Whatever it is, we'll figure it out. Because, if you haven't guessed already, we're in this for the long haul. Whatever it takes, whatever she needs. Bella is ours and we are her forever family.

We see the neurologist again on Thursday and hope to be making some decisions at that time about her neck problems. Thank you for all the kind words and helpful suggestions on how to entertain her in the meantime. We will keep you posted.

This was supposed to be a list of all good things...

I know everyone is waiting to hear how well Bella is doing on her new protocol and believe me, I do have that list formulating. But if you've dropped by our Facebook page recently, you'll know we hit another bump in our road to Bella's happy and carefree life.

Last Tuesday night Bella hurt herself again. We don't know if she awakened an old injury or created a new one but she had an unexpected visit to Tufts Emergency Hospital on Wednesday and is in strict rest and recovery mode at this time. It appears to be a ruptured disc in her neck and we're not sure if it's a new, unrelated injury or a degenerative disease related to her previous lameness.

Needless to say we're all a bit subdued here at Casa de Bella and in a bit of a wait and see mood.

Bella has been a very good and tolerant patient through all of it. They even wrote that she was "a good girl for her exams today and wonderful to work with" in her release notes from the hospital.

In the meantime, she's getting lots of pampering and allowing lots of snuggles. And until next time, we leave you with a glimpse into a recent snugglefest.

In case you think I live in fear of my dog...

I don't.

Or she a life in fear of me.

She doesn't.

As always, thanks for following our crazy dog. We'll be back next week to tell you all how great she's doing.

Little dog, Big problems

"She's a very sweet dog - when she's not biting us."

And so began our most recent conversation with Dr. Dodman and his staff. I'm sure they think Jan and I are absolutely batty.

As with any appointment with Dr. D and his staff, we completed our multi-paged pre-consultation paperwork, and the meeting always begins with a review of it: What brings us there today? What was the original diagnosis? What steps were recommended and how have closely have those steps been followed? Have there been any changes in the household? Any physical changes to the dog? Any new injuries or illnesses?

One of the things I noticed when completing the paperwork was that we had gone off-course with Bella's low-protein diet. With so many cooks in our dog's healthcare kitchen, it is easy to lose track of who said what and when and how and why we should be treating her.

In this case, even Dr. Dodman's staff was surprised to discover that, while Hill's Prescription Diet w/d was a low protein option at 19.2%, the r/d version prescribed for her to help settle her colitis, at 34.6%, was not.

So it was noted that in late July we had switched Bella to a high protein diet and by September, she had bitten Jan again.

Note to self: You alone are responsible for knowing what Bella is eating and managing her protein intake regardless of who is advising you at any given time.

Action item #1: Switch her back to a low protein diet. Add fiber via pumpkin or Metamucil to achieve the higher fiber content which was the aim of the prescription dog food.

I hear  you talking about my food. 

Next up was the discussion of what happened between me and Bella in December. I covered this last week so won't go into again here but it was acknowledged that, while I missed her signals, Bella still shouldn't fly off the handle over such trivial offenses.

We talked about her shoulder pain and stomach upset and how that can wear on one's nerves over time. If Metacam is making her sick, there are other medications we could try to help ease the pain while not upsetting her stomach.

Treatment option #1: Consider a different pain reliever. If Metacam upsets her stomach, find another and get her off this never-ending roller-coaster of ick.

We then went on to talk about the possibility that Bella is suffering from PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) which could stem from her less-than-positive puppyhood on the streets of Puerto Rico or, rather surprisingly, could be associated with when I broke my arm and Bella was left alone for several hours afterwards.

Action item #2: Increase Bella's Fluoxetine dosage. We had never been successful in getting Bella up to the recommended dose of "Prozac" which Dr. Dodman prescribes specifically for aggression issues but is also used routinely to treat PTSD. He recommended now that she has been on it for a while, she may take to an increased dose better than she did when we tried previously.

The conversation moved on to how Bella responds during these incidents which is to say, she doesn't. I mentioned in our intake sheet that Bella seems to "disappear" during these episodes and it takes some effort and an external force to stop her. We also noted that these bouts go on more than just a couple of seconds lasting upwards of 15 or 20 seconds.

Dr. Dodman noted that this particular behavior was not common in 'ordinary' cases of owner-directed aggression and could in fact, indicate partial complex frontal lobe seizures. Huh. I did not see that coming.

Treatment option #2: Consider the anti-convulsant medication Zonisamide. While some of the symptoms Bella is displaying seem indicative of behavioral seizures, not everything aligns perfectly. Adding an anti-convulsant medication could help but it could be months before we'd really know whether or not that was the right diagnosis.

Finally, almost as an aside, I mentioned Bella's quirky little episodes of apparent reaction to unknown pain that I've been telling everyone who will listen about for as long as I can remember. I was taken aback when Dr. Dodman, instead of trivializing my concerns, actually took note and questioned me further about this.

What everyone else had dismissed as "probably" just static electricity, Dr. D took seriously. And on top of that, he gave us suggestions about why it could be involved in Bella's outbursts and what we could do to possibly treat it. He thought it could be nerve pain.

Treatment option #3: Consider adding Gabapentin (Neurontin) to Bella's current medication regimen. Gabapentin has both pain-relieving and anti-convulsant properties. This could potentially help manage both the shoulder pain as well as the possibility of partial seizures with a very notable side benefit being that it would also address any neurogenic pain she has that we have yet to identify.

PTSD, you say?
I can't imagine why.

To summarize, we were left with a number of possible diagnoses:

1. Post-traumatic stress disorder which could be separate from or associated with
2. Frontal lobe, complex partial seizures, and/or
3. Un-diagnosed nerve damage/trauma.

After much discussion, we went home with a prescription of Gabapentin.

The choice was obvious: Gabapentin is often used in combination with NSAIDs like the Meloxicam we had Bella on to boost their efficacy. Add in the neurogenic and anti-convulsant properties combined in one medication as well as minimal side effects and we could possibly treat all of Bella's issues whether conclusively diagnosed or not.

That "not conclusively diagnosed" still gives me pause. If Bella has un-diagnosed nerve damage, shouldn't we be looking into what that is and possible options to fix it? Could we be masking something that should be cause for concern? And what about seizures? If she's having them, should we be trying to discover the root cause and address that?

We've opted to take one step at a time.

We have made the recommended changes and we're monitoring our girl's progress. I keep a daily journal of what Bella eats, what meds she takes, how she feels and behaves. From there we can track trends and gain insight into what is really going on inside that little body (and really big brain) of hers.

Next week we'll talk about how it's been going.

How to Make a Bad Situation Worse in One Staggeringly Stupid Step

So, you want to know what happened when Bella attacked me, do you? I could sum it up in very few words: Leslie is an idiot.

But I suspect you'd like to know a little more about the details than that. After all, 'Leslie is an idiot' will hardly come as a revelation.

Let's start with some background:

Bella had been off the painkiller she takes for her shoulder inflammation for several days. We had been taking her off the medicine when she showed signs of gastric distress from it - balancing her achy shoulder with her upset tummy. At the time of the incident, she had been off the painkiller but not yet showing any signs of benefit to her tummy. So basically, she was feeling pretty flipping crappy.

A week before Christmas and all through the house...

The Friday before Christmas, I had gotten home from work late due to 'issues' and, while I thought my stress levels were pretty much under control, it's entirely possible Bella thought otherwise. Jan said she had been a little snarky with him earlier in the day and when I tried to take some photos with her, I noted she didn't seem especially cooperative this night. I gave up, poured a glass (or two...) of wine and went downstairs to watch some TV with Jan.

I don't remember what we were watching but it was something with bangs and booms and Bella was not impressed. I noticed she seemed to be a little 'off', maybe in need of some kindness and even thought she might be looking for comfort.

She was sitting in front of Jan willing him to share his popcorn. I got down on the floor next to her and reached my arm around her as I have done a thousand times before. I must/may have startled her or leaned a little more than usual because all of sudden she turned, snarling and snapping at me. She muzzle-punched my chin and snapped at my left hand (the one wrapped around her).

I actually told Jan to 'stay out of it' thinking that she would let up in a moment and, given their previous encounters, I thought his interference could possibly make it worse. Well, I didn't need Jan's involvement to make that happen - I made it worse all by myself. As I was trying to stand up and get Bella to calm down, I used my right hand to grab her collar.

And we'll just chalk that up to one big, huge, colossal, gigantically stupid mistake.

Had I not grabbed her collar, the situation would probably have left me with a bruise on my chin, some scratches on my arms and a relatively minor bite on my left hand. Instead, Bella turned and latched onto my right arm with no intention of letting go. Damn it.

Seeing this, Jan ignored my warning to stay away and grabbed Bella's collar from behind at which point she let go of me and I immediately walked away. I headed upstairs to the bathroom knowing there was clean up to be done.

And yes, I also walked away because she frightened me. I didn't want to her to bite me again. My right arm was smarting. Not to mention dripping sticky red stuff.

Upstairs, I took off my over shirt and began to assess and clean the wounds. Jan came up and we locked Bella out of the bathroom while he finished cleaning me up. I am a horrible patient and make an even worse nurse as the sight of blood makes me queasy. As a result, I kept getting light-headed and Jan had to change the dressings for the first few days.

I'm not bad, I'm just photographed that way.  ;)

Anyway, as usually happens when Bella has one of these episodes, she was immediately contrite. It's almost as if she doesn't even understand what just happened. And in this case, I noticed her apparent confusion for several days afterwards. As I mentioned previously, we avoided each other for a few days. Jan has always been so quick to forgive - almost immediately willing to reassure her that he is not in fact the big scary monster she sometimes envisions.

But Bella's not afraid of me. We all know that so I was confused. If she's not afraid of me, then just what the hell happened?

Over the next few days we thought about it and talked about it. We acknowledged the last two 'attacks' had been decidedly worse than the ones that originally sent us to seek professional assistance from Dr. Dodman. In these attacks it was like Bella wasn't even there any more.

When these attacks happened, Bella was solely focused on the 'threat' in front of her. Jan cannot get through to her when she is going at him and I couldn't reach her when she was going at me. However, as soon as Jan grabbed hold of her collar, Bella let go of me and ceased her attack. The same was true when she attacked Jan in September and I stepped in between them to break it up.

That's an important piece of information to remember - it will come into play later on in our story.

---

I've been bitten by dogs a few times in my life. I'm not proud of that fact and I don't present it as a badge of honor so much an acknowledgement that things happen. Dogs mostly do their best to communicate with us but sometimes we miss the signals they're sending. Or sometimes we get complacent and forget that they are entitled to their own moods and issues.

Preoccupied with my own concerns, I made the mistake of ignoring my instincts that told me she was "off" that night. I went on to make an even bigger mistake by grabbing her collar. The lesson I learned is to remember that even dogs have their own rich inner life to which we are not always privy. And we need to be ever mindful that mounting pressures can push any dog over their limits, never mind the crazy ones.

We're all back to good: Bella giving me snuggles and kisses, me trying to remember to give her the space she wants and needs. Bella's never been shy about asking for comfort. Next time I won't try to second guess her. I'll wait to let her tell me what she wants.

---

Next week I'll cover our meeting with Dr. Dodman and fill you in on our conversation and his advice. Thanks for hanging in there with us and our crazy dog. She really is worth the effort.

Bella really is a good dog. Seriously.

I can't imagine what some of you think of my crazy dog after last week's post. But let me assure you, Jan and I are not living in fear here in our house terrorized by our dog.

By almost every measure one uses to determine what makes a dog a good dog, Bella passes the test.

• She doesn't counter surf.
• She doesn't get into the garbage.
• She doesn't pull on the leash. (Well, at least she doesn't for me. She and Jan are still working on that.)
• She doesn't beg.
• She doesn't incessantly bark. (Understandably the postman would debate that point.)
• She doesn't chew stuff up. (Although she steals stuff, she does not ruin it.)
• She comes when 'chicken' is called. (It's our recall word. Don't laugh, it works.)
• She does not have accidents in the house.
• She doesn't jump up on people. (Although that may be changing. We'll work on it.)
• She's not destructive when left home alone.

She does dig but we've learned that as long as we give her a sanctioned place to do so, she doesn't dig where she's not supposed to.

She does sometimes resource guard but you might be surprised to discover that she does not resource guard her food. In fact, Jan and I often have to tempt Bella to eat her breakfast by hand-feeding her. I can take her bowl away from her while she's eating if I forget to put her medicine in her food without any hesitation at all. Does that surprise you?

Bella is a bright, curious and enthusiastic learner. Everyone who meets her from passersby to vet techs, trainers and interns absolutely falls in love with her. (They've even written comments on her intake/release notes telling us how charming she it. I kid you not.) She is a sweet and even sometimes cuddly dog. Who just happens to have some trust/fear issues.

When she attacked me in December, I admit it shook me up. She and I avoided each other for a few days.

It hurt, too. Emotionally, I mean. I thought she trusted me...

But the fact is, it's not personal. Bella isn't 'attacking' out of any emotion other than pure panic. In her mind, I believe, Bella thinks she is fighting for her life.

Over the coming weeks I intend to cover:

1. What happened the night she attacked me, and why what I did played a huge part in making it worse than it should have been,;
2. Our visit to Dr. Dodman, what we talked about and how he was the first person to hear what Jan and I were saying in the 2+ years we've been working through these issues with Bella,
3. The options we were given for possible treatment plans,
4. What plan we selected and what we've been doing to address Bella's issues since, and
5. How she's doing on the new protocol.

After that I'll go into why we decided to see a holistic vet and talk about what that has meant for Bella's physical health. And how and why we think it may help her mental health down the road as well.

I will tell you everything I think you should know. But let me know in the comments if you have specific questions and I will make an effort to answer them.

That awkward moment when...

You discover everything you thought you knew...

Was wrong.

---

I heard a story on NPR last week and one sentence really struck a chord with me. It was something about how we're "photo-shopping our online lives" to appear happy and perfect. I've never meant to do that here on the blog. Especially since I know there are folks out there who have found hope and encouragement through Bella's story.

However, things have happened here at Casa de Bella over the fall and winter of which I have not yet spoken. It was not my intent to lie or mislead. I merely needed time to process everything, to deal with my crazy dog (and even crazier job) while also maintaining some balance in our lives through the holidays.

But first, let me calm your concerns up-front by saying everyone is fine. Better than fine. Good, even. Now.

That wasn't the case for quite some months and I hope to take you through the whole story. It may take a few 'episodes' to bring us up to date as there were many lessons learned and several points to cover.

I'll start with a recap that has some clues into what went wrong in it:

Bella re-injured her left shoulder while on vacation with us in September of 2012. (That would be the last actual, non-working vacation I have had, by the way. Just sayin'...)

Through the winter and spring, we saw numerous vets and made multiple attempts to identify and resolve the problem. All the while, we had our crazy dog on restricted activity.

When we finally found something that helped her shoulder (Metacam), we were immediately faced with battling the stomach upset it brought along with it.

Before this, back in the spring of 2013, our regular vet had prescribed Hill's Prescription Diet w/d (19% protein) for what he diagnosed as Colitis, a very common ailment among anxious dogs. Now that the Metacam was also turning Bella's insides upside down, the neurologist who prescribed it, told us we should be using Hill's Prescription Diet r/d (34.6%) protein to treat Colitis.

That was in July.

I don't know if you can see where this is going but we've now got my crazy dog whose shoulder is feeling loads better on a high-protein diet and regulated activity.

We started seeing signs of Bella feeling better in agility class when she began doing zoomies around the ring. We were slowly increasing her activity but, unsure of how much her shoulder could take, we were being careful, controlled. But she wanted to run and zoom and basically go nuts.

We continued to have troubles with her tummy and, per doctor's orders, were routinely stopping the Metacam until her bowel movements became normal and then starting it back up again until we saw signs of gastric distress at which point we'd stop it again. And so on. And so on.

And the hamsters spin the wheel.

Unsurprisingly, Bella lashed out at Jan again in August. It had been over a year since she had done so.

We made some changes to her meds, talked to and worked with our trainer and had plans to follow up with Dr. Dodman. But shortly before the holidays, Bella did something that threw everything we thought we knew out the window.

Do you see what's wrong with this picture?
At the time, I didn't.
I do now.

We had always approached treating Bella under the premise that she was generally anxious but specifically still nervous around Jan. It made sense: she had only ever bitten him, his beard, glasses, long hair and deep voice are factors many dogs find challenging, and her initial poor reaction to him seemed to stem from when I broke my arm.

But in December 2013 all that changed when Bella attacked me.

I will go into all of it in time but suffice it to say, I missed every piece of information Bella was sending me. Talk about trigger-stacking: high-protein diet, restricted activity, shoulder pain, upset stomach, general anxiety from the winter weather, a dark room, loud television, a couple of glasses of wine (mine, not hers) and a painfully egregious rookie dog-handler mistake ended up with me unable to use my hands for a few days and my right arm for a week. It could have been much worse. (It's of note that it wasn't.)

I've been trying to find a way to share this with you since it happened (and there is some very good news to come out of it all) but I want to give it the time and attention it requires.

We're using some big and scary words about our little girl now. Words like: post-traumatic stress disorder, anti-convulsants, neurotransmitters, neuropathic pain and paroxysmal fear. But we're also seeing tremendous progress and a remarkably calm and happy dog.

Along with Dr. Dodman who is helping us with Bella's behavioral complexities, we've started seeing a holistic vet who is going to try to help us with her Colitis and her shoulder problems. Bella's tummy has improved almost as much as her behavior and we are incredibly hopeful at this time that we will be able to give Bella the pain- and fear-free life she deserves.

Please bear with me over the next few weeks as I try to fill in all the gaps.



My little pumpkin turned 6 years old this week. Happy birthday, Bella. You are still my favorite little Valentine.

Today was a special day

Today was a special day.

Bella was lying in her bed next to my desk. She started mumbling at me. Usually that indicates one of three things: she needs to go out, she wants to play or she wants a treat.

But this time when I turned around, she stayed lying on the bed. She didn't get up to "show me" what she wanted.

It took me a minute to figure out why she was mumbling at me, what she wanted from me.

I got up and sat next to her. She still didn't get up to "show me".

And finally it dawned on me.

She wanted me to pet her.

Bella.

Wanted me.

To pet her.

I stroked her shoulder, leg and foot as she closed her eyes and drifted quietly off to sleep.

Today was a very special day.

Honey, I broke the dog

Here's a strange little story for your consideration:

A few weeks ago, I came home from work on a Friday night. There was nothing extraordinary about this Friday night. I wasn't especially late nor unexpectedly early. I came in the door to my regular welcome home: Jan, in his upstairs office called down "Hello" and Bella, from her perch in the kitchen came bounding into the bedroom to greet me.

Bella and I did our routine little 'snuggle snuggle kiss kiss' and all seemed well. Although in retrospect, Bella did seem just a tad more excited to see me than usual.

I'm not 100% sure of exactly what happened next but I ended up with my hand petting her neck and she screamed in pain. And then she lunged at me.

Oddly, Bella often seems to 'know' it's me even when she flips out and the very second her mouth connected with my hand, she stopped herself. By this time I was standing (I am not as dumb as I look after all) but I did not raise my voice or my hand. She was obviously hurt or scared and reacting to protect herself. She immediately went into a very submissive posture and was trying to cuddle as she cowered next to me.

Posing with her "Peace and Paws Rescue" calendar.

Safety first

I wanted to check her out to see what the heck I had done to hurt her so I quickly grabbed her muzzle and put it on while yelling up to Jan to stay upstairs.

Bella has been trained to accept a muzzle for safety purposes but she's not crazy about it. Still, if there was any possibility my checking her out would lead to her mouth on my skin, she was going to get checked out wearing her muzzle.

And indeed, when I gently ran my hand over her neck, she screamed in pain again and had another little flip out, although not one involving teeth. And again, immediately she was back near me, submissively cowering at my feet.

As an aside, there are no words I could ever find to describe how unspeakably heart-breaking and devastating it is to see her in these moments. There just aren't.

I have never, ever in our history hit Bella. And yet, I have hurt her on two other occasions in the past. Under these exact same circumstances: coming home from work, a happy, excited, little greeting turns into Bella howling in pain at the most inoffensive touch. The really strange thing is it has been while I was touching different parts of her body each time - once on her "croup" (the top of her butt area near the tail) and the other time on her hind right thigh/flank.

They all think I'm nuts

I have tried to recount these situations to vets we have seen in the past about various ailments but they have looked at me like I was losing my mind. I don't know what it is and I don't know what to do about it. I can say that I'm glad, at this time, it has only happened to me and that Bella recognizes me enough to restrain her bite. I do not want to think of what would happen were someone else other than me to trigger her trouble spot.

In fact, I don't even know if it's even possible for someone else to trigger it. This has only happened when she's been interacting with me and all 3 times after I've come home from work. Is there something in her anatomy that gets "tweaked" when she gets so excited? Is she pulling a muscle or pinching a nerve? Is a vertebra slipping out of place? I don't even know what the possibilities could be.

Then again, is this part of what has been happening between her and Jan? While I don't believe there has been any of the "screaming in agony" as part of their altercations, could it be something we have missed?

I do believe there is a component to Bella's issues with Jan that stems from her fear of being hurt rather than any actually pain endured. And yet, in the situation that has happened with me it feels clear that I did in fact hurt her even though I have no idea how or why. And even though I may have actually hurt her, still she moderates her reaction.

Oh Bella, it's a good thing you're cute. 

Bella is a complicated girl and I spend an awful lot of time trying to figure her out. But at this point, the vets don't seem to have any answers and I don't honestly know what to do about an issue that has manifest itself only 3 times in the last 5+ years. If anyone has ever experienced a similar situation or has any insight at all into what is going on here, I welcome all counsel.

A story of hope and progress (For Miles)

There's a story I've been wanting to tell about Bella's progress for a while now but so many other things kept taking precedence. Then something rather serendipitous happened this weekend that made the telling a priority. Let me start with that and then I'll get onto Bella's story.

---

I woke up Sunday morning to the most interesting message that had been left at Bella's Facebook page. It was from the hu-mom of a dog in Australia named Miles and Miles, it seems looks a LOT like Bella. Acts a lot like her too, from what I can tell.

See, Miles' hu-mom had been writing on a local shelter board to find stable, 'bomb-proof' dogs that would be willing to help Miles get over his fear of dogs when our friend Jet over at jet's furkid palace told her about our Bella.

Miles has dog-reactivity just like Bella does but with a slightly different story. I haven't yet asked permission to share his story here so I'll save that for another day but I wanted to write about one of Bella's recent stories to give Miles' mom some encouragement about what these fearful dogs can do with a little time and a lot of patience.

Hi Miles! Nice to virtually meet you!

---

I've written recently about Bella' shoulder injury that had us traipsing all over town for various treatments and examinations. Back in March, we took her into Boston for the first time to visit noted neurologist, Dr. Allen Sisson at Angell Animal Medical Center. I had never been to Angell before and have to say, I was incredibly impressed.


The place looks like a well-funded big city hospital: big, clean, modern, high-tech. The waiting areas for the animals are spacious and separated: dogs in one area, cats in another, yet a third for birds and exotics. Even better, there were two areas for each!

I, now the master of scoping the world for imminent Bella danger, chose the area to the left of the entrance which was empty and hoped against hope it would remain so until we could get Bella into an examination room.

Nice thought.

We were soon joined by a couple whose beautiful yellow Lab was waiting with them on a gurney. Poor old guy was really sick (although we did see him leave of his own volition later in the day) so I knew he was no threat to Bella. She knew it, too. But they were soon joined by another yellow Lab whose owner was more interested in talking to the sick dog's owners than watching her own.

I knew what was coming and knelt down in front of Bella to get her focus on me and doing our training. "Bella, look." Click. Treat. Good girl. "Bella, down." Click. Treat. Good girl.

I'm doing all this quite loudly and obviously - trying to make a point to the other owners that my dog needs special attention when all of a sudden, I feel the telltale sign of a dog's breath on the back of my neck. Not MY dog, this lady's dog. He's so close to us, I can actually feel him sniffing my hair!

"Bella, look." Click. Treat. Good girl. "Bella, down." Click. Treat. Oh you remarkable girl!

And finally "Can you PLEASE get your dog away from my dog?"

Insert gratuitous picture of pretty dog here.

I am not one for conflict. In fact, I avoid it at all costs. But in my time with Bella I have learned that I am the only advocate she has so I have learned to speak up on her behalf. I'm sure many people have decided I'm just plain rude. Surely this woman with her beautiful, stable, friendly Lab walked away with that impression.

But here's the kicker. This dog, in this strange and stressful place, got within a couple of feet of Bella, with me in between and how did Bella react? With a small, quiet growl. As soon as I spoke up, she stopped, laid down and looked at me.

Oh Bella, you are a remarkable girl.

I was so proud of her.

The folks in the waiting room probably thought we were the most awful people they'd ever met with a dog who didn't deserve to be out in public. But I was over the moon with pride at how my little girl handled herself. Was she happy? No, not really. Was she scared? Yeah, probably some. But did she handle it all without causing a scene? Absolutely. And I couldn't have been prouder.

---

So Miles' mom? I know you're going through some difficult times right now. I'm sure you want to die of embarassment at times, weep in frustration at others. Hang in there, though. You can do this and so can Miles. Patience and practice.

And if you ever need encouragement, stop in here or a few of the other blogs we know who are dealing with similar issues: Life with Desmond, Rescued Insanity, Oh My Dog! and Adventures of a Cattle Dog. We all know the pride and heartbreak of life with a crazy dog (or two or three).

If nothing else, you'll discover you're not alone. Maybe you'll even decide to start your own blog letting us follow Miles' progress. In any case, please drop me a note again someday to let me know how it's going. I have a lot of faith in you, your boy and your dog. You can do this. And I know Miles is worth every frustrating minute of it.

What a difference a drug makes... Pt. 3

When we first met with Dr. Dodman to address Bella's aggression towards Jan, we were most concerned, rather obviously I suppose, with the aggression aspect. But in our dissection and discussions, our researching and reading, our observing and opining and (Oh I'm sorry, are you still reading this? Bella tells me she's gone out for coffee and returned by now.... Moving on...)

My point was, as we started thinking things through, we were able to come up with patterns and identifiers as to when Bella was going to short-ciruit on us. And it was all, drum roll please: fear/anxiety-based.

This isn't a huge revelation, to us or the veterinary/behavioral profession. Most aggression in dogs is fear-based. But while we were focusing on her aggression, we weren't paying attention to the effects fear and anxiety were having on her temperament. The "Fly Incident" made us all re-focus on what was sending Bella over the cliff rather than just focusing on the cliff itself.

And thankfully Dr. Dodman had one more tool in his pharmaceutical toolbox for us: Clonidine.

Clona-who?

We had been giving Bella Clonidine on an 'as needed' basis for thunderstorms since we first started seeing Dr. D. He now recommended we try giving it to her every day to see if it helped with her anxiety. We had a .2 mg Rx for Bella to handle thunderstorms already with the instruction to give 2 - 4 tables up to twice a day. HA! HAHA!

We made the mistake of giving Bella 2 tablets twice in a day during the "Snowtober" storm of 2011 shortly after first getting the prescription from Dr. Dodman. It worked but the second dose worked so well, Bella actually wet the bed while she was sleeping she was so sedated by it. NOT what we were looking for. Poor drugged baby dog.

So this time, after a bit of discussion with Dr. D, we started by giving Bella 1 tablet in the morning and 1 tablet just before going to bed.

Unfortunately, Clonidine only works for about 4 - 6 hours and we found we had a considerable gap in the late afternoon/evening time-frame. We also noticed that giving Bella a whole Clonidine in the morning just left her sleepy (a positive for its continued use in the evenings however).

We needed to balance out the fact that she was sleepy in the morning but still anxious by the evening. We found giving her 1/2 a table with her breakfast, 1/2 a tablet with her dinner and then a whole tablet just before bed seemed to offer us the greatest benefit.

It took a few weeks for her to adjust to it but every week as we took her to agility class, our trainer Carolyn could see more and more improvement. Seeming a little sluggish in the first few weeks Bella was gradually getting back to her spunky self just without all the anxiety attached.

It has turned out to be our miracle drug.

For the first time in her entire life with us, Bella wasn't running from the room at the drop of a pine cone. She wasn't trembling at the sight of trees blowing in the wind. And, finally, it seemed, Bella was going to earn her "Sato ears".

Who are you calling Dumbo?

Satos in general have ridiculously big ears and they tend to either stick out to the side of their heads or straight up. Honestly, I can often identify a Sato from a block away just for their adorable, crazy ears but Bella never had them. Her ears were so often pinned back to her head due to stress and anxiety, I didn't even realize she should have them. I just assumed her ears were supposed to be that way.

Until she started on the Clonidine and her Sato ears began making appearances.

Just occasionally at first but more and more over time. Bella's ears don't always stick straight up, they are floppier like a Labs ears but more and more often I have found them sticking out to the side or popping up in the air. They are so freaking cute.

But what really has me over the moon is that it is not just something we think we're seeing in her behavior that proves she's feeling better. We can actually see in her physical appearance that Bella has moments in life now where she's not scared. That may sound extreme to someone who hasn't lived with a fearful dog and it probably makes us sound oblivious and stupid to not have realized earlier just how much distress she was in. But if all you've ever seen are flat-back ears, how do you even know there's anything different to work towards?

Bella's progress since adding the Clonidine has been extraordinary. She still has some cranky moments but a few weeks ago Jan did something she didn't like (he might have stepped on her foot, I think) and she barked at him. That may seem inappropriate to anyone with a 'normal' dog but it was an enormous step forward for us. I believe dogs have a right to tell us when we're doing something they don't like. And that's exactly what Bella did.

She didn't overreact from living in constant distress with a hair-trigger temper. She barked. I'd have been happy with a growl. She didn't lunge. She didn't bite. She barked. She's learning that she has a voice and it will be respected and listened to. She's beginning to understand she doesn't have to fend for herself and treat every transgression as a life-threatening attack.

She's beginning to trust.

Without medications, I don't think we would have ever been able to bring Bella to this point. We would never have gotten her "below threshold" so we could teach her more appropriate ways to react, improve her confidence and see those Sato ears. We are still figuring so much out about her and she is still growing by leaps and bounds to our utter amazement. I will never trust her to be alone with a child, that's a given, but I am so proud of how far she has come.

I'm sure there are people who think medicating dogs for fear and anxiety is a cop-out, a quick-fix in a world that seems too dependent on instant gratification and simple solutions. I believe I waited too long to help Bella because I was worried about exactly that: worried I was seeking easy answers to complex problems. I can tell you this, none of this has been simple. And after a year and half of working with behaviorists, trainers and vets, it has certainly not been a quick fix. But it has been a life-saver.

Bella will never be a social, out-going dog. But last week we took her to a major city animal hospital and she survived both the waiting room and being handled by any number of staff with, if not aplomb, at least a modicum of dignity. She is a smart, sweet dog who just needed a little patience and understanding to bring out the best in her and we are thrilled at her progress.

We have experienced any number of milestones in the last year with her that I hope to relay in future posts. Bella's story is a long way from over but I hope you've enjoyed reading about her journey thus far. I know I'm looking forward to seeing what she's going to do next.

What a difference a drug makes... Pt. 2

Hi all, sorry about last week's cliff hanger. I hadn't meant to do that but our crazy dog has come such a long way since I started telling you her story that I didn't want to short-change the best part. Hence, this 3-parter.

But enough of that, let's get right to part 2, or what I like to call "The Curious Incident of the Fly in the Night-time" (With all due respect and admiration to Mark Haddon).

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Folks who follow us on Facebook may remember last April we began having trouble with these horrible, ugly flies that sometimes appear out of nowhere. They are officially called "Cluster Flies" and I now know more about these horrid little beasts than I ever cared to. They are harmless, if gross and disgusting, but they buzz. Loudly. And a lot.

Back during our very first visit with Dr. Dodman in the Fall of 2011, he had recognized, and diagnosed, Bella with "insect phobia". I didn't even know that was a thing. Apparently it is and Bella has it.

So we knew this but hadn't thought much of it for a while since here in New England there's generally a distinct dearth of insect activity during the winter months.

But when we brought Bella back to see Dr. D after Bella bit Jan again in February 2012, we were talking about her increased anxiety and the subject of insects came up again. In fact, while we were discussing Bella's fear of all things buzz-worthy, Dr. Dodman made a 'Bzzzt' noise in his office and Bella almost lost it.

Seriously, you could see her immediately react to the noise: running to us, cowering and shaking and trying to escape. It took several minutes for her to get over a sound that lasted less than a second. We talked about drugs that would specifically address noise phobias but had decided, since we were already looking to increase the dose of Prosac she was receiving, we'd start with that and see what happened.

And so, as I left you last week, we were able to get Bella to the higher dose of Prosac easily enough, she showed no negative side effects. But it was slowly becoming clear to us that, while the Prosac was helping with her aggression towards Jan, it wasn't relieving Bella of the constant stress and anxiety she suffered from noise phobias and insects.

This became strikingly obvious to us, not to mention our Facebook followers, last April when Bella started having trouble sleeping thanks to those horrid little aforementioned flies.

April 16, 2012

"Oh yay, it's time for another exciting episode of 'Let's figure out what scared the dog out of the bedroom so we can get her back in here and go to sleep.' Maybe we can just bribe her with some chicken......?

Oh darn, it's a fly. It's going to be a long night." Bringing up Bella on Facebook, 4/16/2012

We figured it out and Jan and I chased, swatted and vacuumed flies out of the bedroom for a few weeks in April.

But it became a nightly occurrence and finally, I couldn't stand seeing Bella so distressed all the time and on May 5th, I sent Dr. Dodman a link to a video of Bella completely melting down over 'something' in our bedroom. That something turned out to be a fly but it took us two days to find it because it was hidden in a closet 30 feet away. In the meantime, that left me and Bella sleeping in the basement because she simply would not come in the bedroom at night.

Our poor pumpkin.

Our poor me.

For the purposes of discussion of 'phobias', I want to share an event that occurred around the same time during which Bella behaved decidedly different.

Last May, we were wakened in the middle of the night to the sound of Bella barking ferociously at the door of our bedroom that leads out to our backyard. Most of you probably don't know that, while we live in fairly well-populated town, our house is surrounded by woods and we get more than a few wild visitors traipsing through the yard on a regular basis.

Last year, however, something happened in my neighborhood that never has never happened before: we were visited by a Mamma Black bear and her fairly well-grown cub.

We didn't know that the night Bella went all Cujo on us barking and lunging at the door. We found out about it the next night when my neighbor called us at midnight to warn us not to let Bella out as there were two bears sitting in their backyard munching away at their bird feeders. Oh. Well, that explains why Bella had jumped off the bed just prior to the call and threw herself at the door growling and snarling again. Nice to know. Thanks.

This never happens to us, honestly. By wildlife in the backyard, I'm usually talking about deer and raccoon.

But it really struck me as such a different reaction to Bella's response to the flies that I thought it bore mentioning.

What makes a dog willing to take on a bear but cower in fear at the sound of a fly?

Granted, Bella had a pretty bad experience with bees when we first brought her home to live with us but I think it is far more likely that her fear of the buzzing sounds is instinct. All indications point to Bella being born of a stray of a stray of a stray in Puerto Rico, a tropical island paradise (for people). It would have been in her best interest to learn to avoid things that buzz. Flies, bees and other insects can wreak as much harm on a small puppy as just about any other predator Bella would have learned to be wary of.

So I'm not sure: is this a phobia, "an extreme or irrational fear of or aversion to something"? Or is Bella just really smart? Smart enough to keep herself alive when all she had to depend on were her instincts? Are her genes responsible for what she has come to believe of the world? And do they really still play such a big part in her life that the 5 years she has spent protected in our home matter little in her mind?

You're talking about me again, aren't you?

Regardless of the answer to the nature vs. nurture debate, and personally I believe it's both, we needed to find a way to help Bella survive comfortably in our home. And next week we will do just that covering Dr. Dodman's recommendation of adding Clonidine to our pup's chemical cocktail and the effects it has had on the little wunder-dog's life. Stick with us.

As always, thanks for following the story of the crazy dog.

What a difference a drug makes.... Part 1

Hi everybody. Sorry about the unexpected hiatus - things here at Casa de Bella have been a little nutso. But I did want to finally finish up talking about Bella's experience with medications and our efforts with her at behavior modification. So here we are again.

The next few posts are going to cover a fair amount of chronological time but only 3 major events that changed, and significantly improved, Bella's quality of life (after it had become almost inconceivably mucked up.) This first part is about the realization that we hadn't quite gotten this whole Bella thing figured out just yet.

Part 1 - Bella bites Jan - again

I do love you, Daddy, I really do.
I'd love you even more if you gave me that chip.

We first put Bella on medications to ease her anxiety under the direction of Dr. Dodman in September of 2011. We had some ups and downs with the dosages through that fall and finally decided to keep Bella on a lower-than-recommended dose of Prosac. She became a member of the living dead whenever we tried to get her up to 30 mgs/day - the lowest recommended dosage for a dog her size. (Sensitive dog is sensitive.)

We had also changed her food to reduce her intake of protein and increased the amount of physical exercise and mental stimulation she was getting.

Bella had been doing very well with all the changes and her relationship with Jan was much improved. However, during the holidays that first year on the meds, her stress level began increasing culminating with a blow-out in agility class with Willy. Her cranky intolerance of any faux pas Jan made was also on the rise and finally came to a head with a very serious altercation in February 2012.

(Honestly, my husband is the most patient man on the planet and I love him dearly for putting up with this crap.)

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Bella's relationship with each of us as individuals is complicated. Believe it or not, Bella sees Jan as her protector, seeking him out in times of distress. The problem is she sees herself as mine.

But it's really a little more complicated than that because I'm no shrinking violet whose dog thinks she can walk all over her. But for some reason, every now and then, Bella's fear of losing her most valued resource, that which she associates with getting her out of the shelter and into a home (me), takes over and she flips out.

Bella doesn't really have separation anxiety but this quote by Dr. Dodman describes what's going on with her perfectly:

"A recent study suggests that dogs suffering from separation anxiety are the pessimists of the canine world who always expect the worst in any situation. In the case of separation anxiety, their worst fear is presumably that their owners have gone, never to return." Source - Veterinary Practice News

In our case, I believe Bella's worst fear is that something will happen to me. So Bella lashes out at the presumed threat: Jan. It sucks but it is "understandable".

By that I don't mean it's excusable, I mean it's literally "understandable": we can understand the reasons for her overreaction. And if we can understand them, we can change them.

(Click to embiggen.)

In this case, we identified the following contributing circumstances:

• We hadn't quite gotten the right combination or dosage of the drugs yet,
• Bella's anxiety was ratcheting up again as she acclimated to the meds and our own stress levels rose over the holidays,
• It was winter and Bella wasn't getting as much as exercise as she had been through the fall,
• She had just suffered the altercation with her agility classmate, Willy, making her nervous and hyper-vigilant and finally
• When she lives under constant stress and nervousness, Bella's "trigger" point is much lower.

But while we may have understood all this, we had no idea what to do about it. So off we went back to Dr. Dodman.

His first line of advice was to see if we could get Bella back up to the higher level of Prosac (Fluoxetine). We were much more successful getting her up to the 30 mg a day this time around. She hadn't turned into a zombie, she maintained her appetite and her enthusiasm and everything was looking up.

But then we noticed something else: the increased dose didn't zombie-fy her but it didn't seem to be doing much of anything at all. She was still fleeing the room at every tick and tock and every drop of a pine cone on the roof. And not just fleeing but fleeing and trembling and cowering in fear.

Bella was doing very well with Jan. In fact they spent a week alone together while I was traveling for work which seemed to further solidify their budding relationship. But we still weren't confident another outburst wasn't waiting in the wings. Her anxiety remained at epic levels and, even if she never reacted badly again, we knew her quality of life was suffering due to her continuing to live in constant fear - of life.

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Not a happy state for our little heroine but don't give up on her just yet. We'll be back next week with the second part of this, the final chapter in Bella's redemptive arc.

And here's just a silly picture of my little wack-a-doodle to remind you she's actually a good girl.

Two steps forward, one step back

Lest you think life with Bella has been all unicorns and rainbows since we started her on the 5-pronged approach recommended by Dr. Dodman including medications and her Agility for Reactive Dogs class in the Fall of 2011, life just never really seems to go in a particularly straight line.

Even while we were making progress training Bella over the various agility obstacles, and she was taking her prescribed medications, eating a low(er) protein diet and getting as much exercise as we could work into our schedule, in January/February 2012, Bella started showing signs of increased anxiety at home again. She began darting from the room at the slightest sound, not sleeping through the night and becoming even more frantic about storms and unexpected events.

What? Me, worry?

Things came to a head in February culminating in 2 events that made us realize not all was well in the state of Bella:

• First, Bella and Jan had another scuffle in February. I called Dr. D.s' office immediately but it would be April before we could get back in to see him for a follow-up.


• Then, a week or so later, we learned how quickly things can turn south in a classroom full of reactive dogs.

In the early days of class, our trainer, Carolyn, would have us walk the dogs around the room in a parade route fashion - each dog staying appropriately distanced behind the next to keep them under threshold. The idea was for the person following to be responsible for maintaining the distance behind the dog in front. But sometimes the dogs have other ideas.

Bella had been toodling right along in class for a couple of months when one night, while she was stalled admiring the alluring aroma of classmate Elmo's mat, classmate Willie decided to trot his way over the dog walk heading straight towards Bella at a pretty good and noisy clip. I, sadly without eyes in the back of my head, was watching Elmo in front of us and missed the signals Bella was most certainly sending me before she blew up like a mad dog in Willie's direction behind me. Hrumph.

Landing solidly on one of my knees and following that with my face, the best I could do was hold on (and pray I hadn't just broken my knee). Bella continued to lunge and growl at the end of the leash and Willie gave his owner a good tussle mimicking Bella's behavior back at her. It took a moment for everyone to realize I wasn't able to get up and suddenly Jan and Carolyn sprang between the dogs - Jan getting Bella back under control and Carolyn helping Willie's owner handle him and herd him back to his mat.

Sweet little Elmo remained rather oblivious to the whole encounter as he was now on the opposite side of the room.

Still not quite calm but getting better.

The trick that salvaged this situation was the the double leashes we use on the dogs in class and Carolyn's requirement that we wrap the loop end of both around our wrists. In my case, I often push the loop up over my elbow since my hands are small and I worry that the loops will slip over and out of my hand.

That practice may have sent me sprawling but it saved Bella from breaking free of my grasp and getting to Willie which would have been a disaster. (Willie had previously been attacked by another dog IN a training class. No wonder the poor guy has reactivity issues.)

The mark of a good teacher, in my mind, is the ability to read a situation, understand the needs and motivations of her students and change her teaching methods if and when they're not working for any individual. Carolyn is a very good teacher. And she has made several modifications to her approach in teaching us and helping our dogs over the life of our class.

After Bella's little outburst, Carolyn stopped having us walk around together in a circle and had us all line up along the same wall. Baby gates and sheets separating the dogs so they couldn't see each other at all except during controlled warm-up periods. Over time, as the dogs got better at that, we started working them on some of the obstacles during the warm-up sessions, first one dog at a time, then two and finally the whole class working together at the same time.

Bonding over treats and training.

So while we waited to get in to see Dr. D and get his recommendations for Bella's continuing anxiety, it was a great relief to be able to rely on Carolyn's experience and advice on how to keep working on Bella's reactivity and improve her relationship with Jan through the classes.

Jan and I learned we need to take turns as Bella's handler each week. Improving Jan's relationship with her is our highest priority but at the same time, we can't have mine suffer as a result. We could end up having the same problem but just reversing to whom it's directed. Everyone has a role to play in helping Bella heal and we each have to be a part of the solution if this is going to work.

Thank you, daddy, for teaching me.

Jan and Bella's relationship has improved over time and with a great deal of effort and patience. I am fortunate to have married the most amazing man in the world, one who clearly never gives up on those he loves. Bella surely is one lucky girl.

Agility for Reactive Dogs...

...and their spectacularly coordinated humans. (Uh, that would not be us, by the way.)

It's been a while since we've talked about the goings-on in Bella's life. But we are back and ready to talk about one of the most exciting and helpful activities we've undertaken in all our time with Bella.

October 12, 2011.

A day that changed Bella's life. The day we attended her first "Agility for Reactive Dogs" class at the "Dogs' Learning Center" located right here in our own hometown.

Having a forward-thinking, innovative training center not more than a few miles away from our house has been an incredible boon in our life with Bella.

Having access to a Karen Pryor Academy Certified Training Partner (KPA CTP) and Faculty Instructor with years of experience in agility as well as reactive dogs has been an absolute god-send.

Having two left-feet has been... Well, okay, yeah, that, not so much.

A note that came from our soon-to-be trainer, Carolyn, about our first class should have sent red flags a-fluttering and Robot arms a-flailing ("Danger Will Robinson!"):

Class will be run as a reactive class. Bring a mat for relaxed downs. We will gate/sheet as needed, use distance, etc.

Dogs should be on a head collar or front clip harness and another piece of equipment such as a martingale collar. With 2 leads or a lead clipped to both.

Bring lots! of small treats, clickers, mats, water/bowl.

Feels a little like this.

So just in case you didn't catch that, that's one dog, two leashes, a clicker and treats.

And we're going to take all of that and try to teach our reactive, scared-y dog to manage all the obstacles around an agility course while other reactive dogs try to behave themselves nearby?

Alright-y then.

In the year+ that we have been doing this, I am proud to say Bella has only sent me into face-plant territory once. We have, however, knocked over jump poles, gotten tangled in the weaves and tripped over each other with fair frequency.

And by "we", I mean me. The dog is fine, it's her owner who can't walk in a straight line.

(As for the other half of the human equation, let's just say that while Jan is considerably more coordinated than I, that's hardly setting a high bar.)

Reactive dog class basics.

Let's talk about some of the very most fundamental basics of reactive dog classes. I'm going to assume most of my readers have never attended a reactive dogs class or an agility class so please don't be offended if you already know all about this stuff.

A prerequisite for the "Agility for Reactive Dogs" class is that everyone must have attended a beginner class for reactive dog handling. We had and while we found out later that much of what we thought we learned in that beginner class was not quite right, it left us familiar at least with the terminology, the setting and how to enter and exit the building.

And the very first thing you learn in a beginner reactive dogs class is that reactive dogs class begins before you're even in the class. Because it's not like you can just go strolling into the building like you have a normal dog or something.

Negotiating the parking lot.

Nervously watching another dog on the dog walk.

Bella still has issues when she sees dogs while she's in the car, so we always park as far from the entrance to the building as possible. This is in an attempt to keep her "under threshold" as she watches people and pets come and go.

But basically there is no point at which Bella is not in full-blown panic mode about other dogs while she is in the car so we try to get her out of it as soon as possible when we arrive. If she's out of the car, her reactivity is less and she has something else distracting to do (sniff, pee, sniff, pee, sniff, pee and sniff some more...)

But the deal is - from the moment we arrive in the parking lot until we're driving home after class, every time Bella sees a dog and doesn't react like a snarling lunatic, she gets a treat.

Getting in the building.

Yup, there's a process for that. We wait outside while the class before us ends and the owners get their reactive dogs back in their cars and then we are called in. One dog at a time.

Again, class is already in session even when you're just entering the building. See a dog? Click, treat. Walking nicely? Click, treat. Go ballistic? Divert and distract. (We'll explain that in subsequent posts.)

Getting settled.

With reactive dogs, we use mats/towels to give the dog a place to associate as their home base, their "safe space". So while we're getting settled and stuff unpacked, Bella is asked to 'go to her mat' and is rewarded for sitting quietly. Lots of clicks and treats. If she can relax to the point of resting on one hip, she gets lots and lots of treats.

The atmosphere in the room is one of calm. Everyone speaks just loudly enough to be heard. And we all try very hard to get in and the dogs settled as quickly as possible without appearing rushed or getting the dogs too excited.

What's in it for me?

Not all dogs in a reactive dogs class have the same level of fear or a fear of the same things. Bella's pervasive fear of everything "unknown" meant we had to first get her to associate going to class as a good thing before we could ever address her fear of other dogs or the agility obstacles.

In the earliest days of class, we just stuffed Bella full of treats throughout the entire class. As long as she wasn't wigging out, she got treats. But to turn fear into enthusiasm, those had to be some mighty tasty treats.

In fact, the treats have to be something that the dog values more than she fears 'the big scary'.

We've tried everything from hot dogs to chicken to cheese and just about every training treat on the market. We've finally settled on Red Barn Naturals food roll that we chop into pea-sized pieces. They're soft and moist, which we find means they don't get stuck in Bella's throat quite as much as dry treats, and they're slightly less slimy than some of the other food logs we have tried.

(We do have another trick up our sleeve of an even more highly valued treat but we didn't need/learn about that until later in the course... Stick with me, we'll get there.)

With so much good food and all the attention she could ever desire, Bella was sold on class after the very first night. That she got to learn and jump was just a bonus. In fact, as time went on we had to work to calm her down, she was so excited to be going to class. Good grief. "If it's not one thing, it's another..."

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So that's the (very) basics of the reactive dog part of our class. I'll talk more about the agility part of class next time.

I really struggled to write this post because I can come at the subject of this class from so many different angles - the reactive dog, the fearful dog, clicker training, agility training or even the role medication has played. If there's any aspect of it you'd like to hear more about, don't hesitate to let me know in the comments.

Understanding that I'm not a trainer and addressing fearful, reactive or aggressive dogs is way above my pay grade, I will share with you what we've learned and offer lots of Bella stories along the way. This class has probably been the most influential activity we have pursued for Bella's mental health and the rewards have been absolutely inspiring. I hope you'll find our journey interesting as well.

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